What we say can affect those around us, and also us. Take care of what comes out of your mouth, as much as you care about what you put into it 😉
Another blast from the past article done in 2005, a little “verbal” spring cleaning is good for all of us too.
War of the Words
First posted 01:11am (Mla time) July 02, 2005
By Katrina Holigores
Inquirer News Service
ONE OF my favorite authors posed an interesting question in one of her books “How difficult have you made your life?” We often fill our days rationalizing, brooding or obsessing about things that may not really be beneficial to us in the long run anyway. We say things to ourselves that are not positive or uplifting, we make mountains out of molehills, we “sweat the small stuff” not knowing that our own anguish, frustrations or bitterness towards a situation (or person) has an exponential effect whether it is a direct or indirect interaction. When we’re in a bad mood we tend to use harsher language towards the people around us, we blow up, and we sometimes say things to others that are cruel and hurtful. What we may not be aware of is what we scream or sarcastically snort out to either someone else or ourselves doesn’t do ANYONE any good. But man, it’s nice to just blame someone else for the crap going on sometimes right?
I once read that the vocabulary you use is essential to the kinds of energies that you attract or deflect in
your life. When you start your day off dreading work, dreading school, dreading your spouse, partner or family member then the way you deal with people is going to be affected.Think back to when you were younger, if your dad or mom came home in a grumpy mood… was it a good time to ask permission to go out? (off with
your head!!) the reverse is when your parents are in a good mood and all of a sudden its like Christmas has come in early. Be mindful of the language you use when dealing with others, it is NOT your helpers fault that your
boss has decided to drop a load of work on you right before a long weekend. Your driver did not cause the traffic on Edsa and it’s not his fault either that whichever lane you decide to pick has become the slowest moving one.
The salesgirl behind the counter did not cause that huge zit to appear on your nose and your little brother or sister is not to blame for your boyfriend dumping you (unless you’re starring in a telenovela).
So, how difficult have you made your life? Understand that troubles are often self inflicted, we tend to read too much into ordinary situations. When we are too emotionally embroiled then we put too much meaning into a
tiny, insignificant gesture. “Did you see/hear what he/ she/ did/ say?” you exclaim to nearby vultures. Honey, your arch rival sneezing in public does not a criminal make.Everytime you add a negative thought into your mental file on someone or yourself then you’re just basically inviting more bad vibes in. Maybe if you
could be more conscious of what you actually think and what comes out of your mouth you will invite a lot more positivity to enter. There is a formula in life, and that like begets like. If you surround yourself with
garbage, you start to smell like it, same goes for your internal process. Overload your daily routine (mental, physical and spiritual) with enough crap and don’t be surprised how your life will begin to reek of it.
When was the last time you made an effort to do or say something nice (and mean it) every single day? Ok, we’re not all Bree Van De Kamp every single moment, but it doesn’t take a lot of effort to say to the person beside you
how nice he or she looks today, or how much you liked what he or she did or said. Am going to stress though that you have to MEAN it, flattery without sincerity is just more BS. Deepak Chopra, in his bookThe Seven Spiritual Laws of Success explains how a daily output of sincerity and kindness goes a long, long way. And yes, eventually it finds its way back to you, and hopefully at a time when you need kindness and compassion the most. During days of stress and frustration, before you decide to vent on a poor, unsuspecting soul (read anyone with a heartbeat) take a really long deep breath and focus on something that gives you joy. When I say focus I mean LOOK or READ something that gives you peace. I’m not saying raid your fridge and stuff your face till kingdom come. Yes, watching a movie counts, listening to music counts, driving with lots of alcohol swishing inside you
does NOT.Try and make a habit of making someone else feel good on a daily basis, but be conscious of your intentions when complimenting someone. If you choose to flatter for the purpose of getting something in return, then eventually you will begin to question the sincerity of others towards you. It’s not fun to live in paranoia or doubt. Perhaps it’s time to change your battle cry. Good luck soldier.